Today was sports day and neither VT or I felt like exercising but we still wanted to get out of the dojo and get some fresh air so we decided to bring our computers to the park and code in the shade. It's fall and the temperature was perfect for that activity. Coding Dojo could have done a better job picking a better office environment than the once we are at right now. I mean there are no windows except near the door and artificial lighting and air conditioning dominate the surrounding. That is not healthy. Most modern day businesses should know that little things like natural lighting go a long way to maximize productivity.
We had a good afternoon and afterwards a bunch of us went to have lunch at an Indian buffet. When we got back I completed the video that would be uploaded to our site. The instructor likes our idea and suggests that we publish our project for public usage after we complete it. That would be super fantastic for both professional attention and to impress our friends. I know VT is all about impressing girls, a feeling I don't oppose.
When I wasn't working with him I was working on the Black Belt preparation. I made only one good step today in that direction, which was a disappointment. VT is the first to remind me that I can't be like this in the dojo. If we're feeling let down and act like we already lost then we're not going to succeed in here. He does have a good point and normally I'd have high spirits for being here and building an exciting future but it does become hard to maintain that course of action when stuck on a complicated problem, with majority of your classmates abandoning efforts, and warnings for a future with no guarantees.
I talk about having plans for the future but I don't go into details. There's a reason for that. I periodically reflect on my past behavior and I notice that I tend to set myself up for extravagant futures which lead me to make unrealistic goals and promises that I can't keep. I become too enamored by where I want to go and not focused enough on where I am currently am. Perhaps if I had done that more often I might have avoided some nasty moments. So I keep my mouth shut more often these days. Even now, I won't go into details yet with anybody but I will express fear that I won't live up to them. Even with all the preparation and resources I'm investing in it I've learned that nothing in life is guaranteed save death and taxes. I've had my share of misfortunes to learn that I am not special and there is always someone out there who is better than me at something. So I might end up doing all this and not seeing any return.
I expressed that same fear to my brother prior to the bootcamp and him being the bigger risk-taker of the two of us told me that it shouldn't stop me from at least trying. Worst thing that could happen is that nothing happens and if that is true then I can say that I tried and make peace with where I am. Those words were enough to remove any fears in me and sign up for the bootcamp. Why shouldn't it remove any fears from me now.
On the bright side I made a significant step today with the Black Belt preparation. I figured out where I went wrong with logging a user in and that ought to set me up for a better morning.
No comments:
Post a Comment