Well today was a complete disaster, and I'm not just speaking about myself. The caffeine burnt me out and I slept past the alarm clock and light. I had to skip breakfast. We didn't have algorithms this morning and instead the instructor gave us free range to prepare and take the Black Belt exam when we were ready. A bunch of us left to get some breakfast from Starbucks. After that I spent about two hours trying to understand form validations with Angular before I resorted to a cheap and non-secure method. Then lunch came and I ate quickly in the kitchen, acting like I was a death row inmate eating his last meal. After lunch I sat down and began the test.
Some of the requirements were never discussed in the lectures that included: 1) saving a current user the same way you would with a session, 2) passing conditional data from the client-side controller to the view, 3) and tallying up scores. We had five hours to complete it but it took me two hours before I gave up. The instructor warned us that most of us would fail the first time but we should take it anyway for exposure sake. I was left feeling frustrated and anger fueled me. Most of my classmates felt the same way too and I felt like exercising or doing something to vent it out. A bunch of us went out to get dinner and drinks afterwards and it did calm me down, albeit leaving me a little unhealthier than I already am. We came back to the dojo to hang out some more. There are five of us left. Three of us are playing a game in the kitchen while VT is networking with students from the newer class, leaving me here to contemplate the week's events and my feelings towards it.
My relationship with MEAN can be described as a love-hate relationship. Several of my classmates are married and a couple of times I have heard the married men say that marriage is difficult and they've lost their heads more than once; but regardless, they don't regret getting married in the first place. MEAN is mean, but I'm willing to stick with it, I'm just burnt out mentally and physically.
The hackathon is tomorrow. I thought it was going to be in SF but VT made a mistake and it's actually in Sunnyvale at 9AM. I don't really feel like waking up early tomorrow and one of the instructors said that I should spent this weekend preparing for the project week. Still, I didn't want to go back on my word to VT. Then RS broke the silence and told him that he can't come on account of the importance of the weekend in preparation for the project week and that gave me the influence to tell him as well. He didn't like it but what could he do?
I see my friends from high school and college at least once a week but everything I see them it's like more time has gone by than it really has. I use to find them all annoying for one reason or another but spending everyday with the same people in the confined dojo space can take a bigger toll. Nobody is perfect and I spent too much time focusing on their imperfections and not enough on the real reason we got together in the first place. I guess it's about have the right perspectives, learning to balance expectations, and not relying on them entirely for personal growth. Much of that comes from within.
I'm thinking about emailing one of them and seeing what's up. They've got their own things going but at least I want to let the person know that I'm thinking about them and wish I could have tried harder to stay connected.
No comments:
Post a Comment